the dr's i saw at burrrows institute of neurology had prescribed that i continue to reduce the lamictal and start on another anti seizure drug called topamax. i have been reducing my lamictal slowly for 6 months. i am now taking less than half of what i was a year ago and have had no real seizures.
i have done a lot of research on topamax and have decided not to start it...... it was a very hard decision and not one made without much prayer. lamictal was a last choice drug when i went on it 4yrs ago. pharmaceutical companies come up with new drugs all the time now and dr's prescribe them without any idea what they will do to any one given person.
to take a drug for any reason is scary, but to take one whose soul purpose is to alter brain activity is frightening beyond belief! to live life with a brain that i can't quite make do what i want is bad enough, but to wonder who i will be once i put that pill on my tongue and swallow it down....well after 20 years of playing medicinal russian roulette, i am not doing it any more.
i love Easter! i love my Savior! i am thankful for the life i have been given and i am grateful to have been given the chance to live by faith on a daily basis!
every person with epilepsy or with a loved one with epilepsy knows that a person can die of a seizure. so what that means to me is that at any moment i could find myself face to face with my Father in Heaven. many days it is a real hope! yay today might be it! i can't stand life one more day! please let me out today! other days i am happy to spend with the ones who know me love me anyway......
the number one side effect of topamax is suicide, so with one decision i have made the choice to leave it up to the Lord. i will continue to do the best i can with every day.......